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Stink bomb


An Excerpt from MARKED (a work in progress)

stink bomb

“Hey Jake.” It was Lucas. “Hey Jake, come here.” Whispered Lucas. “What does he want me to do this time for f#@k sake?” Jake thought. Jake waited for a second or two for Lucas to come to him but it became clear that wasn’t going to happen. He walked over to Lucas and was lead around the corner where Ox was waiting with a cheeky grin on his face. Lucas opened his hands and there was a small paper package with the words STINK BOMB in red lightning bolt type and a drawing of a kid holding his nose as stink lines rose up from a small explosion on the ground. Here were two big tough burley grown men standing holding a stink bomb and giggling like little children. It was brilliant. Jake had been walking around with the weight of the world on his shoulders for months; immersed in death. The smile spread across his face like a mid summer bush fire. “We’re going to let it off in the toilets.” Lucas said with a glint in his eye. This was the first time he had seen Lucas like this. He was like a big kid and Jake liked him, no loved him for it. “It’s gunna be brilliant.” Ox said. “You can also get FART SPRAY and LIQUID ASS.” Ox said snickering like a ten year old. Jake had never seen a fart bomb before, even as a child. It was like he was getting a second chance to relive some small piece of his childhood. The three men giggled their way upstairs trying not to laugh when they passed other police officers. The captain gave them a look from his small office and Lucas gave him a little wave. This was obviously out of the ordinary and made the captain uncomfortable because he returned to his paperwork as fast as he could.
Jake held the door of the toilet block open while Ox and Lucas read the instructions. Lucas did something to the yellow paper satchel, Jake didn’t see, and then using only the tips of his fingers he threw in gingerly onto the floor of the bathroom and closed the door quickly. The three men stood snickering under their breath waiting for something to happen. It didn’t take long for their curiosity to get the better of them. Ox opened the door and peeped in. He opened the door a little wider so the other two men could look inside. They all watched as the paper package slowly inflated with hydrogen sulphide, or rotten egg gas. But nothing was happening. The bag was now swollen like a ball but nothing was happening. A uniformed constable walked by to see the three detectives standing at the toilet door peering in. She barely raised an eyebrow; it was as if this sort of thing happened every day.
Ox eventually broke the stalemate and tiptoes into the toilets. Jake’s snickering had now turned to chuckling if not outright laughing. This was the funniest thing he had seen in years. Here was this giant of a man, OX, tiptoeing like a ballerina over to a kids stink bomb. He gently touched it with his foot. The stink bomb wobbled a bit but nothing. Getting braver he kicked it perhaps two inches, again it wobbled. Lucas and Jake were bent over laughing. It was so ridiculous. They could all be fired for this one stupid act. But it so didn’t matter to Jake; this was the most fun he had experienced since joining the force.
Ox kicked it again, a little further this time. The stink bomb was now completely round and it rolled around the floor of the toilet from the kick. Ox had to give it one last kick. “POP” the bomb made a sad almost pathetic sound as it exploded but wet brown liquid spurted all over the walls of the toilet block and all over Ox. Jake fell to the ground he was laughing so much and Lucas was having difficulty breathing. The only one who wasn’t laughing was Ox who had a disgusted look on his face that made the other men laugh even harder. By now a couple of the uniformed police had walked over but soon left when they saw it was just a couple of detectives being assholes. Ox quickly washed off the splatters he had on his face while Lucas picked the broken bomb up and put it into the bin. The toilets stunk really fowl and so did Ox, but he had started to see the funny side and had joined in laughing with the other two.
Jake began to gag from the rancid smell so he never really saw how much damage they had done to the toilet. The brown liquid had splattered all the way up to the ceiling. The three men walked away innocently as though nothing had happened. Ox took the rest of the day off to go home and change and Lucas and Jake sat innocently at their respective desks waiting for someone to say something about the mess they had created. But no one ever did. The splatters on the roof were still there six months after the boys had let the fart bomb off. The only thing that had changed was that Jake’s contempt for Lucas disappeared overnight and a new friendship was born. They were now a team and a good team at that. They would join together with Lucas’s experience and Jake’s tireless youth to catch one of the most notorious serial killers of all time.
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About ispiderbook

Anthony is a first time novelist who is based in Sydney Australia.

6 responses to “Stink bomb

  1. Hi, I have nominated you for The Next Big Thing Blog Hop, if you want to join in, please check out: http://sammicox.wordpress.com/2013/01/05/the-next-big-thing-blog-hop/
    Brightest Blessings

  2. Mick ⋅

    That sounds rather familiar.

  3. hahahaha….The kid inside of adults never goes away, does it?
    This is so damn funny…

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